Sugar and Spice and Everything Nice

As it turns out, I'm not as interesting or funny in person as in text.

(Perhaps I'm neither of these things in text either.)

In the past week, I eagerly ran around blabbing how I was going to create a video post for my next blog entry.  I was super excited to catch up with every tween on the planet who regularly posts on YouTube.  I geeked out over Spring Break, went to the Apple store, and learned how to make movies.  But, my recording was so lame even I was bored with myself.

Preparing to record I was so bonkers I knocked over my favorite plant, killing yet another jade tree, anxiety-ate my weight in granola, sweated for the first time in ages (I'm always freezing) and adjusted everything 4 zillion times.  All so I could sit alone in my home and talk to my computer.  All of which could and would eventually be edited.  I'm such a weirdo.  Alright then, Universe, I will write.... not utilize my newly-acquired iMovie skills.  The Universe (or God or Allah or Buddha, whatever you prefer) has been telling me lots as of late, most of which you'll read below.  All of it was recorded but I'll spare you thirty minutes of yawning through my lame vid.  I plan to edit and spruce up my recording so it may appear here someday.  But not yet (or ever).

Before I begin all the granola-eating hippy talk, I'll give you a quick run down about what is happening with the little fellas residing in my liver.  Half a dozen tumors remain.  I'm receiving monthly injections of Octreotide aka Sandostatin.  This lovely shot is administered at the hospital via large needle to my back side.  I treat myself to vegan ice cream in a gluten free cone at Sweet Action Ice Cream Shop - my FAVE- after these special hospital visits.  If this medication does as it's supposed to, the tumors will not grow any further.  The chip on my shoulder comes from the fact it doesn't shrink or eliminate cancer, just keeps it from growing.  Personally, I'm done with cancer, ready for it to be gone, brush off my shoulder and be on my merry way.  

I will have an MRI in May to compare with the MRI from February taken at my 6 week post-surgery check up.  Tumor growth will be monitored every two months.  If there isn't growth or change, we stick with the injections, pun intended (wink).  If there is change or growth in the tumors, the plan will change at that time.

The good news is I'm feeling pretty great.  I have an addiction and it's called YOGA.  For a few weeks now, I've been able to regularly attend yoga classes of all kinds and my body loves it.  Almost as equally exciting, I went for a walk in the park recently and decided to try running.  Ready for this?  I was actually able to jog for about 3 minutes!  Yay!  Me!  I'm continuing acupuncture, of course, my other drug of choice.  In fact, as I sit here composing this non-video post, I just ate an amazing organic, gluten-free sandwich and drank a veggie juice at another of my FAVE places, Parsley, following acupuncture which was preceded by early morning yoga.  Ahhh, yeah.

Just a year ago I knew very little about what I was putting in my body.  A lot can change in a short amount of time.  Now, people are coming to me for advice about being vegetarian, gluten-free, and what herbal supplements to use.  Sadly, I'm grossly under-qualified to answer anyone's questions about diet and nutrition... but I can tell you what I'm up to.  This is my blog after all (wink).  Prepare yourself for an adventure!  You're about to go on a journey through the time continuum of my eating habits.  It's like Space Mountain at Disney World, except not fun or exciting.  However, you could wear Mickey ears while reading this and sit in the sauna to simulate Florida weather.

Juicing, smoothies, supplements, and changes in my diet are ways for me to take care of my body and ailments as naturally as possible.  Western doctors were making it rain pills.  I went to the doctor for help with digestion, but that Rx caused headaches, so I was given a prescription for headaches... which came with another set of side effects for which I received more pills.... and so on and so forth....  No thank you.  There is a time and place for pills and I'm not Rx free by any means.  I'm merely looking for balance.

Warning:  hippy talk about to commence, if you're interested, please continue reading.  If not, check ya later, man.  Peace and love.

I eat organically as much as possible.  Someday I'll grow my own food but until then, I'm at the mercy of Whole Foods.  I think about the bombardment of chemicals my body endured for nearly 30 years and it's a wonder I've made it this long.  (Actually, it's a wonder I've made it this long not just because of how I used to eat.)  Processed foods are not good.  I avoid them as much as possible.  Our bodies are not designed to digest them.  I think I only ate processed foods during my college years.... If you've never had Amigo's Mexi-fries at 2 am, you haven't lived.  In the years that followed, we all heard the negative effects of processed foods and I cut down some.  Now, I've almost completely cut out all processed foods.  Yay!  Me!  I'm not going to beat myself up when I want some fries, but I certainly won't be pulling into a McDonald's drive-thru to get them.

I've been vegetarian for years but moved further towards vegan on the spectrum, giving up diary and eggs.  Milk has been out of my life for many years, it's weird being a member of the only species to drink the milk of another species.  Looking to become vegetarian or vegan?  I'd recommend reading The China Study.  It's a great guide to all things nutrition and gives lots of info about plant-based diets (such as mine when I'm not at oyster happy hour.)  I can't help but have sea food from time to time.  It's so delicious.  But it also freaks me out sometimes.  Again, I'm weird.

I'm fairly new to juicing and it pretty much rocks my world.  Juicing is exactly what it sounds like:  you take a bunch of steroids.  Oh wait, that's the OTHER kind of juicing.  Right right, I'm not Lance Armstrong.  I was confused for a second.  Besides, my wrist bands are WAY cooler.  (Love you, cuz!)  I was turned on to juicing by Shelley and Lyndsey.  Juicing is taking the fruits and veggies you love and making them into juice (thank you Captain Obvious).  This is an excellent way to get nutrition without having to Bugs Bunny-munch carrots all day.  My favorite recipe right now is celery, apples, ginger, and lemon.  My hands and feet were swelling after surgery so I looked into it;  celery is a natural way to reduce swelling so there are stringy, green bits a-flying when my juicer is powered up.  In the beginning I was a wild woman juicing kale, cucumber, celery, apple, carrot, lemon, and ginger.  I've toned it down a little.  Since I'm notoriously late everywhere I go, I juice a ton of fruit/veggies in the beginning of the week and put it in a large pitcher.  Throughout the week I fill up a water bottle as I'm sprinting out the door on my way to work and alakzam! I have nutrition for my day.

Smoothies started when Betsy bought me a Nutribullet.  Best.  Present.  Ever.  In a (brief) moment of genius, I realized I should use the pulp from my juicing endeavors in my smoothies.  My current smoothie recipe includes apple and celery/lemon/ginger pulp, frozen berries, maca powder (this is the ginseng of South America), goji berries, almonds, pumpkin seeds, and wheatgrass.  After blending, I usually add some vanilla flaxseed milk for flavor, B-12 and astragalus for its supreme immune bolstering plus so much more.  All organic, of course.

Short and simple:  squeeze a lemon in your water.  Switch to green tea instead of coffee.  Green tea has about one fourth of the caffeine of coffee so you still get a little kick but it won't dehydrate you like coffee does.  Plus, it's badass.

I'm sure you've picked up on my gluten-free vibe by now, even though I'm so subtle about it.  I have what's known in the GF World as an "intolerance."  I'm not full on Celiac.  I can eat foods from kitchens with cross-contamination and a little bit of gluten usually doesn't bother me greatly.  If I were to eat, say, a piece of bread though, it's a different story.  The misery that ensues is pretty intense.  If you've never experienced "basketball tummy" you're a fortunate human being.  It's exactly what it sounds like:  you've swallowed a basketball which gives you the look of being 6 months pregnant and sticks around for at least 48 hours.  During these lovely 48 hours, you're not hungry at all.... but your brain tells you to eat because that's what humans do to remain living.  So, you make food or order dinner and try a bite.... only to become completely satiated after two forkfulls.  If I were a spy captured by the Russians, this is how they'd get me to break.

Gluten-free can be tricksey.  When I first started eating this way, I assumed I was doomed to the life of a bunny as salad seemed like my only option.  This is not true.  I'm fortunate to live in an urban setting where I have many options for grocery shopping and restaurants.  If you do not have this luxury, good luck to you.  Just kidding!  My experience is mostly trial and error.  I've done some research and found what works for me.  I joke about being a "granola-eating hippy," but seriously, granola is delicious.  I love granola.  Especially Boulder Granola but also Kind Granola, which is more wildly sold.  Eat it as a snack on the go or pour some almond or flaxseed milk over it for a yummy breakfast/lunch/dinner.  You can use rice flour for baking anything your heart desires such as bread or cupcakes... ummmm... cupcakes.  Quinoa and couscous are gluten free.  Both can be made with some veggies for a delicious meal or side dish.  I'm spoiled because my mama makes me bowls of quinoa with veggies and all I have to do is heat them up.  I'd recommend reading Wheat Belly for actual expert insight on this topic.

Make your own protein bars, or get my dad to make them!  He's a pro!  (He also makes homemade puppy treats so hit him up for some of those, too.  Fido will thank you.)  Homemade protein bar recipe musts-haves:  oats (gluten-free if you'd like), peanut butter, and almonds or any kind of nut (sometimes you feel like a nut, sometimes you don't).  Add a natural sweetener like maple syrup or honey - if it's from the region where you live, it can help you build an immunity to local pollens which helps with allergies.  Other ingredients to toss in:  chia seeds for fiber, flax seeds for Omegas, maca powder for energy and balance, coconut oil for thousands of reasons, dark chocolate just because it's amazing and also these reasons.  The world is your oyster here (be careful if you see me coming at you with some horseradish), add whatever you'd like.  Gluten-free?  Yes.  Organic?  Yes.  Chocolatey?  Yes.  Fruity?  Yes.


As previously stated, I'm not an expert.  I've been listening to my body and obeying it's orders.  The first time in my life I'm obeyed orders... and they were given by me.  Go figure.

Take a moment.  Listen to your body.  What is it telling you?